Fluctuation

Well, it turns out that Katie was getting high earlier when I called. Me asking her to promise to stop didn't go over too well. She assured me that she only does it every 6 months or so, so I guess that's ok for now. She said she was goin' to a fair on Friday and Saturday, with Sean, Dira, and lots of other people.

The most painful thing during the call was that she "got high with her baby's daddy." That just tore me up inside.

Though when I asked when she wanted me to call tomorrow she said: "I don't care, I just want you to call." That made me feel extremely good. But she asked me where I thought we were, and I said I thought we were together. I said, "Do you want to be together?" And she said, "I don't know. I don't know what I want." So we're together. How is it possible to be so happy and so depressed at the same time? Maybe we should arrange for me or her to go visit the other around Christmas or in the summer.

I should note that our call went in this order:
>Drug part / Daddy part
>Together part
>Call time part

So it got better, not worst, as we got talking. I guess I'll try her at 6:30am tomorrow. 9hrs and 50 mins 'till I call Katie!